Sharing part 2

Been working quite a bit actually - GO ME!

This one is probably my favorite:



more to see HERE!

The DJ

“It’s not love for music, it’s a passion, and it goes beyond liking, and beyond a hobby, it’s about a way of living… Music is essential for my life.” – Armin Van Buuren

There's just something about a guy with passion... any passion. I attest that to the unexplained attraction to muscisians, artists, athletes. Part of the stereotypical attraction has to go with a guy that can really explain something with such a great passion and fever that makes the girl want to be the canvas he uses, the guitar in his hands, the mitt over his hand, or in my case the sound board under his fingers.

Stolen kisses require an accomplice

So I'm dating... which is always a bit odd for me. So when I'm fuzzy I do what every person my age does... Google It. Apparently its a popular subject... among men? So many pages dedicated to helping a guy navigate a single mom... I didn't realize we were so difficult?

The basics of the advice I found for potential suitors is: we're a bunch of controlling, straight-forward, spitfires, who may want you but don't really need you. Be patient, understand we're completely guarded, and if you give us time we may come around.

Which is true,well sort of. Its more about protecting ourselves and our kids. We're neurotic and blunt because we don't have time to do anything else. The articles themselves were quite amusing though... the image of some studly man googling tips on how to deal with his date.  

However the resources for single moms are quite limited. Ms. Single Mama has: Finding a Man Person. And Single Mom Seeking has 3 Mistakes to Avoid if You're Dating Again. There have been a few others, but mostly whisperings of what's worked in their current situation.

Maybe this will be mine

The Femme Fatale

Elizabeth Taylor [was] pre-feminist woman. This is the source of her continuing greatness and relevance. She wields the sexual power that feminism cannot explain and has tried to destroy. Through stars like Taylor, we sense the world-disordering impact of legendary women like Delilah, Salome, and Helen of Troy. Feminism has tried to dismiss the femme fatale as a misogynist libel, a hoary clich?. But the femme fatale expresses women's ancient and eternal control of the sexual realm. The specter of the femme fatale stalks all men's relations with women. -

Camille Anna Paglia

The "femme fatale" the pre-femenist, the woman that believes in dressing up and getting what she wants because she's a woman.The funny thing, is that I've found that these women, those of us open to dresses, heels, cleavage, cupcakes, and shameless flirting... We believe we need men least of all. We find them useful, convenient, even practical at times, but hardly necessary. We can do anything without them. They're always replaceable.

As you may have guessed I've been accused of being lots of things. However, I've never believed being self indulgent is a crime. If I paid for it, or accomplished it under my own means... then I'm not spoiled, I'm successful. My mentality has been changing, I'm refusing to allow myself to hide out again. I'm refusing to even consider being victimized by lonliness.

I will access every power I have, every shred of pride, and make my life what I want it to be.

Your actions are speaking so loud I can't hear what you're saying.

"Your actions are speaking so loud I can't hear what you're saying."
part of SDL's post : Old People Say the Wisest Things 2

I knew what I thought that meant. Then it changed a bit. Or more so I think I was applying it to others, when really it should have been applied inward. How often do we judge, but hate to be judged. Right?

So I've always said I want to be more social, and actually have been making that effort. Shocking I know. There have been game nights, and drinks nights, and Monday involved awesome Turkey Tacos and quite a few bottles of bubbles.

I've also always want to be more artistic and expressive. Which also has been happening more. I'm going through Moleskines like crazy, writing most days, and even doodling a bit. I'd like to get back to full on collage and image focus, but beggars and choosers.

I've also wanted to be more focused on Peyton. Reading and playing, shopping and painting. Visiting the park and the zoo and everything else a little one should have. Which I've been much better about reading with her before bed, spending time with her after dinner, and being proactive on the weekend days.

So its become a full complete juggling act to keep Parenting, Artistic and Social me satisfied, but I'm trying. Really Really trying. Mom and Teal have been watching Peyton quite a bit though. Guilt ensues. So my actions are reflecting my personal wants. However, my intentions are still blurry. So, where do we find the lines, and how do I keep actions, affirmations, and intentions balanced? Or atleasted balanced enough?